Tuesday, June 22, 2010

A special father

I wrote the following for the Herald Democrat Life section for last Sunday:


When I think about Father’s Day, I always remember my own father first. Luckily he was serious about his role in raising my brother and two sisters and me. He spent time with us, shared himself with us and taught us about life and more. His last words to me came as I was leaving his hospital room before he had surgery from which he never recovered. “I’m going to love you all of your life,” he called to me. He was my special knight in shining armor who could fix anything for me.


I know another special father who lives in Van Alstyne. You might think I’m going to write about my husband Billy Wayne here, but although he is a special father, he’s not the subject of this writing.


This special father is younger and has more children — all girls. He always thought he would have a son and teases about it now, because he has four beautiful girls who were born to him and others he’s adopted emotionally.


I’ve been blessed to be close to this family almost from their beginning. When Griff and Kristi Servati came to Van Alstyne, they were two youngsters themselves just starting out. Kristi was a coach and teacher at the high school and Griff was the youth minister at First Baptist. They made a difference in the youth of Van Alstyne almost immediately. My daughter is one they influenced.


I remember her saying she wouldn’t get married until she found someone just like Griff. She eventually found her Griff, but that is another story.


Over the next 13 years or so, Griff became a father to Raigan, then Kerrigan, then Jaidan and finally Kailan.


One special thing I remember is a Valentine surprise Griff orchestrated for Kristi. It was nothing elaborate, but he did it all himself. It was a portrait he had made of the girls, I think there were three of them then. He had to fix the girls’ hair for the picture, and although he didn’t do it as well as Kristi would have, he did it for his family.


He says now, he’s happy having just girls. A boy child in their house might upset their balance at this point. As Raigan began to participate in youth league sports, Griff always stepped up to be a coach for softball and then soccer. He didn’t know anything about soccer when he started, other than he wanted his girls to play because it would be good for them. So he set about teaching himself. He has coached Raigan’s team and Kerrigan’s team and will, no doubt, coach Jaidan’s and Kailan’s teams if they decide to play.


All of the things I’ve mentioned are wonderful, but there’s more.


Griff and Kristi have both mentored countless teenagers over the past 13 years. Some of the young men who’ve grown up watching the Servatis have said they know how to be a father by watching Griff.


One young woman who is about to have her first baby told me just the other day that she wouldn’t be the person she is without the Servatis’ influence. They took her into their home for her last few years of high school and she learned by watching them. She said doesn’t want to think about who she might be now if not for the way she was influenced during those years. Now she knows how she wants to raise her children.


This year the Servatis have opened their home to a foreign-exchange student. JaJa has been a wonderful addition to the family and they will all miss her when she leaves for Thailand this week. So will I.


There is yet one more dimension to Griff’s fathering abilities. He will say he’s not doing anything special. He will say he’s just doing his job, and that’s right. But one of the things that impresses me is his faithfulness to his mission. There is no fanfare, he just does what needs to be done. He will never know how many lives have been changed because of the lifestyle demonstrated to and shared with the teenagers in Van Alstyne. When Raigan was little, she referred to the youngsters in Griff’s youth group as “Daddy’s kids.”


That’s exactly what they are.